SBGradMag Stony Brook's Graduate Student Magazine

In a turn of events leaving the campus community dumbfounded, Graduate Student Organization (GSO) President Ryan Soule and Eileen Chanza, Editor-In-Chief of the Graduate Magazine were found in a warm embrace behind the Humanities Building dumpsters, according to a source special to the Department of Sociology. The source did not reveal whether the embrace was Marxist in character.

In the past few weeks, Soule and Chanza have been embroiled in a controversy regarding Editorial decisions at the Magazine including whether or not questionable images of She-ra would appear on the front page. President Soule did not comment on why he disliked the Princess of Power. “It is very immature of him to criticize my writers’ taste in cartoons,” said the Editor.

But it seems that the two personalities are beginning to settle their differences. The Editor reportedly told Soule, “By the Power of Greyskull, I command you to reinstate my powers!” To which the President appealed, “We should not fight each other. This is exactly what Skeletor wants and this administration cannot let him win!”

For the first time, some undergraduates are taking notice of graduate student politics. “So like, I was lobbying for PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) to take away Britney’s dog and stuff ‘cause—you know—who knows what she’ll do next. But this is like so much more entertaining,” said Christina D’Ambrosio, a Sophomore majoring in Journalism. Her Statesman gossip column, “Eileen & Ryan Sitting in a Tree” has been picked up by mtvU.

Whether or not the honeymoon will last is uncertain. “You know how lovers are,” said Dan Woulfin, a graduate student in the History Department and long-time member of the Senate. “One minute they’re fighting and the next minute they’re prancing around in loincloth.”

In other news, the Philosophy Department overthrew patriarchy last week. The Women’s Studies Department filed a complaint for “existential” reasons and Graduate School Dean Lawrence Martin responded by shutting off the Internet.